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This Guy Gives a Master Class in Being a Hamptons' Jerk

Author Raj Mahal
Author Raj Mahal
A former Bank of America trader-turned-comedian (and CNBC contributor) who goes by the stage name Raj Mahal, has posted "A Wall Street Guy's Guide to the Hamptons," along with a video, on the CNBC website.

It's meant to be a satirical humor piece, but it offers a chilling vision of the douchebaggery heading our way this summer when hordes of young Wall Street titans-in-training invade the East End..

Mahal offers such advice as “Try to be in Montauk if you can afford more than a doublewide trailer.” He deems Amagansett, East Hampton and Water Mill acceptable second choices but cautions against renting in Hampton Bays, unless "you feel comfortable in Wildwood, NJ."

Mahal also counsels making sure the house you rent  is near Cyril's. the Sloppy Tuna, and Surf Lodge and has a pool and a jacuzzi, limiting the number of people in the house (it would look gauche to clients), and putting down as small a security deposit as possible. "Hopefully, the casualty will be the rich homeowner's Douglas fir dining room table," he writes, "not your bank account.”

How do you feel about the Wall Street tsunami heading our way?


valerie doran April 01, 2014 at 01:54 PM
agree with TTTT-your choice of words is immature and unprofessional. btw, this guy is NOT even remotely funny. if you locals hate the "hamptons wannabes" so much, stop taking their money in your establishments. case closed.
mtpock13 April 02, 2014 at 10:23 AM
Go home - you have no respect for the environment and are very greedy people! GO CRAWL BACK TO WHERE YOU CAME FROM.
lisa April 04, 2014 at 07:25 AM
Valrie Doran~ You are the "funny" one. Unfortunately we need their money. You must be one of the "Hamptons wannabes"...sorry for you...that's a hard nut to swallow... .Awww..poor thing, YOU : (
NickMalark April 13, 2014 at 07:15 AM
Boy are we thin skinned today. How exactly does one person's jokes become a Tsunami of invading wall street people?
Steve April 14, 2014 at 01:32 PM
I think the purpose of this article is to mainly fire up aggression for the tourist season...why? Things can get bad enough without the "press" stirring the pot. At least *try* to get along.

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