Shoreham-Wading River Grad Spins Spinal Injury Into a Positive

When Joey Byrnes had a back injury January of 2011, he recalls working through the pain over the next few months during his job as an apprentice for a heating, ventilation and air conditioning company. And then in April, he could bear it no more.

Two surgeries and one postponed wedding later, Byrnes and his fiancé Alexis Friedman – Shoreham-Wading River graduates who currently live in Miller Place – have formed All Backed Together, a nonprofit that supports individuals with spinal injuries and is working to raise funds to support spinal research.

"After my first surgery, I remember thinking of trying to help others going through something similar," Byrnes said on Tuesday. "It was struggle after struggle after struggle, and I was almost trying to find a reason to live. I'd be in pain all day, asking 'Why is this happening to me?' That's when I came up with All Backed Together. To let other people know, 'We got your back.'"

In the two-and-a-half years since, Byrnes – now 27 years old – has suffered injuries to the point that getting out of bed can take up to two hours, and he is still unable to work because of the wrenching pain.

What he says he's found in the time he's been injured is a lack of support for victims of back injuries, which some may consider a commonplace injury, though can really cut through the bone.

"I think some people almost frown upon back injuries, like someone who has back pain, the first thing that comes to mind is someone sitting at home on a couch taking pain meds, who wants to collect a paycheck. Sure, there are people like that, but I know people who have wanted to take their own life over this kind of pain.

"I've had people come up to me and tell me to move out of the way," he said. "But my life has been totally restricted ... It feels sometimes like I'm being stabbed with two really thick swords from the sides, into my spine. It's horrible."

Friedman, who has worked as a replacement teacher in the Shoreham-Wading River School District – though, due to budget constraints, is still hoping for a full-time role – called back pain "kind of like an invisible disease. He looks fine; he's a good-looking 27-year-old man ... but he has excruciating pain on the inside."

In addition, she said, the pain takes on a mental aspect as well. 

"It's so hard for someone so young to have such a big life change as this. Though it's not just about age – even people in their 40s or 50s, this can be something that is mentally debilitating to anyone."

To help stem that, All Backed Together is holding its first fundraising event on Sept. 7 – a 5K run at Cedar Beach. Cost to run is $25, increasing to $30 as the date gets closer.

Byrnes said that if this first event is successful, a friend in Chicago – whom he met through All Backed Together – has expressed interest in organizing a fundraiser out there. In time, Byrnes hopes to build up the support group to build an aquatic therapy facility, something he said has helped him build up his legs to support his back.

"I want to make us one of the biggest organizations there are," he said. "So many studies go unfunded, and I want to see research reach new levels it has never been to before."

As for the couple's wedding? There are bigger things to take care of right now, Friedman said.

"That's just a piece of paper. We're basically married anyways. The most important thing is that he gets better before we move on with any wedding plans."